Things That No Longer Phase Me

I've been in Thailand for a decent amount of time now, and I've come to realize that a lot of the oddities/awkwardness/shockers that phased me in the earlier months, no longer have that effect. So I've compiled a list of the more apparent changes...


1. Being stared at: Pre-Thailand, I despised being stared at. I had a pretty awful "me-syndrome" where I became completely paranoid if I noticed someone staring my way. "Do I have something on my face?" "Is my hair a disaster?" "Is my fly down?" I would immediately consult a mirror to make sure I wasn't a total mess. But here, I'm stared at a lot. And it's not because there's something on my face, or my fly is down. There is a very high chance that it's because my hair is a disaster, but more likely, it's because I'm white. Like I've said, being white gives you celebrity status in Thailand and the stares are just a reminder. In the beginning of my time here, I was a little freaked out by the constant stares, but now I embrace it. I am farang. Hear me roar.  


2. Motorbike Madness: During my first four or five months here, I was 99.9% sure I was going to die via motorbike. But, now I kind of love them. Riding on one is so freeing, but I'm more impressed by their utilization. 

• A means of transporting a family of 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8....you get the point. Seriously how do you fit 3 grown men, a teenager and a newborn child on the bike?
• Who needs a car seat when you have...well...nothing. I've seen one too many babies being held in one arm while the other arm is driving the motorbike. Scary! I've also seen toddlers riding on the back. 
• Thais are so comfortable on the back of the bike. So comfortable, in fact, that they can eat a bowl of noodles, text, read, or do homework, all while sitting (helmet-free, mind you) on the back of the bike.
• If you have to buy a 100 pound bag of rice, it makes total sense to load it on the back of your motorbike, right? No. 
• Or, if you are moving, you may as well bypass the hassle of renting/borrowing a truck and just strap on your ENTIRE life onto one bike.
• Opening a new restaurant has never been so easy. Just hook on a grill and drive around town, looking for hungry customers. 
• Even Thai dogs are motorbike pros. I love it when I see a dog standing in the small space between the front of the bike and the seat. I will never understand how they are able to balance. One of the most impressive things I have witnessed was seeing TWO dogs in that small space while the bike rounded a corner. Wow. Just wow. 

(Image courtesy of Google)

(Thanks, Google!)

                                          

3. Sweating and Humidity: ALWAYS. I am very aware of how hot I am, but I no longer fret about the size of my hair or how sweaty I look. I have a lion's mane look going on, and I think Simba would be proud. 

Sadly, I think Simba's hair looks better than mine.

4. Being dirty. See #3.


5. Not understanding 80% of what is going on around me: I can pick up the gist of a conversation, but for the most part, I am completely clueless about what is being said. Someone could be screaming bloody murder, and I probably would have no idea. 


6. The students not understanding 80% of what is going on around them in the classroom: I used to panic a little bit at the front of the classroom when it fell completely silent and all I could see was a sea of confused faces. I would awkwardly try to maneuver my way around a topic but fail. Now, I thrive on awkwardness. I like to sing little ditty's or pull out the "Bueller....Bueller...." line when no one has a clue what is going on. The kids probably think I'm a weirdo. 

7. Geckos: We are family.    

8. Bugs in my food: Seriously not an issue. I can just pull the ant or fly out of my water or out of my noodles and continue on. Out of sight, out of mind. 


9. Freaky food: Pig's blood soup, anyone? Or how about some chicken feet? No? I guess you'll settle for some fried duck beak, or chicken intestines. Yikes. I definitely don't eat these delightful sounding dishes, but I'm no longer surprised at what is considered a delicacy anymore. 

A particularly disturbing looking bowl of chicken feet

10. Restaurants in every way, shape and form: I will happily eat food from a restaurant, a shoddy little food stall, a portable stall while sitting on the side of the road on a plastic stool, the market, via motorbike or from a person walking roadside with a basket. No matter where it comes from, it is always delicious. 


11. Extremely loud noises (usually accompanied by bright lights): Be it a concert, karaoke, a dinner party, the radio or the TV, Thais LOVE to celebrate (or relax) with abnormally high volumes. Bus rides can be torturous when the driver decides to blast Thai rock for 4 hours straight. Everyday I become a little more deaf because my eardrums get a little more damaged with each passing minute. Any sort of festival is sure to leave my ears ringing for days, and my eyes a little blurred because of the neon lights accompanying the sounds. But I've learned to tune it out. It's some sort of superpower, I think. 


12. Thai fashion. Scrunchies? Check. Acid wash jeans? Check. Full denim outfits? Check. Bedazzled shirts? Check. One would think I was living in the 80s, but nope, that's just Thai fashion for you. 


13. Beer and ice. At first, I was weirded out when my beer was served in a glass with ice. But with the heat and all, it makes total sense. I'm actually more phased by it not being in my beer. I mean, no one likes a warm beer. 


Basically....what is my life?